What the heck is a furry?
A: I've written a full answer
to that question here.
Where did you get a name like "2".
A: It actually came to me in a dream I had about a stone gryphon.
Aside from your stand-up shows, what do you do for a living?
A: Comedy is what I do for a living. And it doesn't pay worth shit. Don't
ever do it.
I've heard your rants and I'm better than you! I'm going to make my own
rants and dethrone you as ranting master!
A: Go for it! I'm not here for a competition. I'm just expressing myself
and hoping to inspire a smile or a thought here and there. I don't expect
any titles or status. If you want to play "king of the castle",
then you go right ahead and do it. I'm not interested in playground games,
so I'll be doing something else.
I heard you live in a group called "NARFA". Is that some kind of cult
A: NARFA is the Northwest Arkansas Regional Furry Association -- an evil,
elitist group of fantasy creature enthusiasts known as 'furs'. Like all
furs, we have sex with animals, defile God and kill children, just like
it says on TV and in upstanding news magazines like 'Vanity Fair'.
since moved to the Los Angeles area, however, and am now with a new group.
And we only rape animals on every other Thursday.
I like your music. What software did you use to make it?
A: I know it's an archaic and crazy idea, but I make my music by playing
these ancient devices known as 'instruments', through which you actually
use your hands to manipulate strings or keys to make sound. Not that there's
anything wrong with clicking a button in a program and having it generate
a song for you... actually, yes there is. It's fucking lazy and uncreative
and will be the death of music as we know it.
Can I burn your rants onto a CD to listen to?
A: Sure you can. The rants are free to all. Just as long as you don't
use them to make money or something. Then I'm going to want some of it.
Is it OK to burn episodes of "2 Sense" to disk or broadcast
it on my radio show?
A: The 2 Sense Show is free entertainment. You can do anything
you want to with it with the exception of selling it. If you sell it,
I shall kill you in the face. Other than that, have fun! Burn it, rip
it, put it on your Ipod, show it to your friends. Yes, you can broadcast
it on your radio program/station. Make copies of it and scatter them by
airplane. Blast it from a bullhorn into a school playground. Take it to
a romantic dinner. Have rotten, coked-up sex with it. Enjoy it any way
Q: What happened to the artwork on your site?
A: There was never any art on my site. Just crap. There are far better
artists out there than me and it occurred to me that showing off those
terrible "drawings" of mine in a fandom filled with such talent is like
trying to race a Dodge Viper with a golf cart while dragging a fat guy
on a rope. It's just embarrassing. Maybe one day I'll be skilled enough
to show my drawings again, but for now I feel I should keep them to myself.
Can I commission a rant from you? Or at least make a suggestion for a
A: I don't accept commissions for rants. It's basically selling my opinion
for money and, last I checked, I'm not a politician. Until recently, I
did accept suggestions for rants but I don't anymore. The last time I
actually made a rant based on someone's suggestion, ("Hey, you should
make a rant about English!") I later found that person running around
telling people she was writing my rants for me.
More to come...